Day 15: Joe Versus The Volcano

Day 15: Joe Versus The Volcano

John Patrick Shanley is in my books a genius. Mix in my favorite queen and king of romantic comedies, Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks, a silly plot and the worst puppet shark I’ve ever seen (except the Goonies octopus – which I saw- which you probably didn’t, but if you go back and rent it you can see it in the deleted scenes and no why that scene should never see the light of day) and you have yourself a PERFECT MOVIE!
I think this might be a bit hard for me to write about as this, like Goonies, is such a childhood favorite I can’t possibly talk about this like a normal human being. Well, I think I have shown myself already to be pretty abnormal so what the heck right? I love LOVE This Movie! And I don’t care if I’m the only one on the planet who does (actually I think I may have one or two others in my boat but judging by the rolled eyes of my coworkers, I know I am at least in a minority here). Yes this movie is CHEESY! Yes this movie has some horrible special affects. Yes this movie has Meg Ryan in 2 baaaad wigs. But this movie has some incredible music, lots of visually and symbolically beautiful scenes, a great sense of humor and one of the best moral lessons ever: Get a Second Opinion on a Brain Cloud Diagnosis. Look, like my duck blanket and my puppy, this is a piece of my heart that you can have your own opinions about all you want, but I LOVE THEM and that’s all there is to it! Here’s how Joe Versus the Volcano checks off on my list:

• Giddy: Every damn scene!
• Lie: Lloyde Bridges and Robert Stack both convince Tom Hanks that he has a brain cloud and is going to die anyway so why not jump into a giant Volcano. That’s one big lie!
• Big Emotional Outburst: I can’t tell you how many times I have seen the scene at the top of the volcano with Meg and Tom professing their love, but I never get sick of it!
• Dance Sequence: The lonely, awkward Tom dances to Buddy Holly on top of the floating luggage. Sigh – I dance the same way at home alone.
• Wedding: Yes, on top of the volcano with the soon to be extinct Waponi Woo’s.
• Rewatchable: Well, lets put it this way, if I can say the lines as they’re saying them though every scene, yeah we got a rewatchable. I think there are maybe 3 movies that I can say that’s true about and this is one of them.
• Love: I would like to believe this one falls under the category of love at first site. Mmmmm… can you hear it? My heart is melting just a little.
• Fantasy: We have a brain cloud, a rich man who swoops in and gives you a gigantic spending spree before you are to die, an ocean voyage, a typhoon, a Hawaiian like island, a volcano and love that keeps you afloat (along with great luggage).
• Journey of the main character: The rediscovery that life is beautiful is a wonderful tale that I love having told to me. We all get bogged down in jobs that suck, stressful situations, and life can for a while look bleak and bland and then suddenly you get a wake up call to all the beauty and abundance there is in this world that is out there for you. Like Joe says “Dear God, thank you for my life, I forgot how big it all is”.
• Body Count: And here we have not only 3 shipmates on the Tweedle Dee but an entire ISLAND! That’s right folks, this Romantic Comedy has mass genocide in it!
• Music Montages: Dom Dom Dom Dom Dom bee doo bee Dom Dom Dom Dom Dom, Dom bee doo bee dom – wa wa wa wa wa… ur… I mean – Buddy Holly during the fishing scene.
• Strong Female: She says it her self folks when he asks her if she believes in God and she says “I believe in myself, I have confidence in myself”.

Day 14: 27 Dresses

Day 14: 27 Dresses

I feel like a kid in a candy store with a pocketful of cash! 27 Dresses is the closest I’m going to come to living out my dream of having 100 weddings! And though, I would probably tell my fellow actors that the costume designer has gone overboard here (blatant bad taste in the bridesmaids dresses and why does Ms. Heigl always have to be in flower prints?), I admit to you dear reader, I LOVE almost every scene in this movie! Weddings, Weddings, Weddings and all the best parts about them (and humiliating – I’ve held 2 wedding dresses while my lovely lady friends peed, been there and oh can I relate!). Once again we have great side characters (well except the sister – who I don’t know if this is a personal grudge or not – but I HATE her- she is one the worst actresses I’ve ever seen and she makes me feel as if I’ve lost brain cells just watching her try and act). But this is one, I don’t care about the plot or the characters at all, just give me more DRESSES! YES!!! Oh and we have so many great embarrassing moments too! By the end of this movie, I’m like that kid drunk on sugar, I’m laying back, half giggling, half shocked I ate all that and pretty sure a stomach ache is around the corner. Here is how 27 Dresses checks off on my list:
• Giddy: Oh hell yeah! We have lots to be giddy about! The dresses, the weddings, the moment she realizes the one she wants and leaps onto a boat to crash another wedding and publicly declare it, the singing at the bar, the dresses, pretty much every line out of the mouth of her best friend (Judy Greer) such as “Are you kidding, the only reason to wear this monstrous dress is to have some drunken groomsman rip it to shreds with his teeth”, Katherine Heigl saying in that oh so pained way “I feel like I just found out my favorite love song was written about a sandwich”, James Marsden saying “Get over here”, and did I mention the dresses?
• Lie: Well, the terrible actress sister is lying her boobies off, then there’s Mr. Marsden sort of lying that he’s not Ms. Heigl’s favorite journalist, and Ms. Heigl’s been hiding the whole time how in love she is with her boss.
• Big Emotional Outburst: Oh yes!
• Dance Sequence: Besides all the wedding dances (my FAVORITE) we also have the Benny and the Jets song and dance. I have to admit, until this movie, I never thought of this as a song to sing at the top of your lungs on top of a bar. Now the theme to Greatest American Hero… yes of course… but Benny and the Jets? Well… they pull it off.
• Wedding: YES! SO MANY I LOST COUNT!!!!!
• Rewatchable: Yes. YES! YES! (I’m saying it in the When Harry Met Sally way – and you’re saying as you read this “I’ll have what she’s having”)
• Love: Ah let me point out another of my favorite myths that are ultimate truths in the RC world: The kiss tells everything (Hitch actually makes fun of this point). Here once again, the absolute right guy for her is all wrong and we know because they kiss and there is no spark. The wrong guy for her is actually the right one. I love this simple way at looking at life. I really wish it was that simple!
• Fantasy: Well once again, we’re in NYC with FABULOUS huge apartments in Dumbo, we have great jobs for eco friendly companies, we have all these really expensive weddings, and a man who gives FLOWERS all the time! Which, I have to tell you this: as me and my co-workers are all crowded around my computer watching this movie, we all equally start complaining about how we never get flowers and how we all want them! And then I go home and for the first time I think in 8 years, my husband actually surprised me with FLOWERS! Whoa!
• Journey of the Main Character: She is weak, she is run over by everyone in this film, everybody takes advantage of her and she allows it for some inexplicable reason (actually she reminds me a lot of a cousin of mine) and all of a sudden she flips and starts to stand up for herself. I would too if I had a sister who ripped up our mothers wedding dress. I’m so glad I don’t have a sister! Especially one that is that bad of an actress!
• Body Count: Nope- but guess what I DON’T CARE CAUSE THIS MOVIE HAS A TON OF WEDDINGS IN IT!
• Music Montages: erm… I think so… I’m sorry I’m still high on all those weddings, I can’t remember.
• Strong Female: Well she starts on the path to becoming one…