My Big Fat Greek Wedding

I adore this movie! And like most people, I can relate. Though, I'm on the quiet white side of things (I can relate alot more to Michael than Nia in this movie: I married into a large Filipino family). What should be the sequel is 2 large outrageous families from different cultures. I wonder what that would be like! (Well as long as Joey Fatone is in it that is, isn't he adorable?)
Another way this movie is way too similar to my own life is that Nia is a bit more on the chunkier side in this film and they never excuse it. She was an instant role model for me, that chunky women can play the romantic lead. I wish I could have such luck! I wish she had stayed the way she was (did anyone see her latest film I Hate Valentine's Day - She looks like in every scene her only subtext is "I wish someone would let me have a burger"). But alas, she lost a ton of weight... and alas, I'm here writing about RC's instead of being in them. Bitter table for one! Okay lets just get right to it shall we:

Giddy: Yes! I love the sweet proposal, the scene where Michael gets baptized and Nia says to her brother "I keep waiting for him to say 'Yeah right your so not worth'" and her brother replies: "Yes you are", and lines like "Did you say I was beautiful" and "I'm a snowbeast".

Lie: Nia is lying to her family to hide her boyfriend.

Big Emotional Outburst: Yes quite a few! I love particularly when the father is yelling at Michael about not asking for his permission to date his daughter and Michael asks if he can and he says "NO". So cute!

Wedding: Yes! Maybe not a fantasy wedding, honestly its up there with maybe one of the more hideous weddings I've seen and I've seen a redneck version of a Renfaire wedding so I know what I'm talking about, but its great! Spitting and all!

Dance Sequence: Yes! Opa! My favorite is with Joey Fatone-he looks so intense I think he might kill her.

Rewatchable: Yes! Again we have another movie my husband just won't sit through with me. Maybe I should start that as a category? The ones I can get others to sit with me through vs. those I have to have closet love for?

Love: This guys joins her religion for her! That is LOVE!

Fantasy: Okay I'm gonna be a bit brutal here, but I'm thinking the fantasy is that family can always be that unconditionally loving

Journey of the Main Character: She had spent the majority of her life being embarrassed by her family but through the love of her man, she learns to love herself and thus learn to love that part of herself.

Body Count: none

Music Montages/Soundtrack: I don't really find the music that memorable but there is a great dating/making out in the car montage that has me contemplating was I just way too easy?

Strong Female: mmm...not really... I mean she does finally take the step to getting classes and changing her life to something better and that takes courage soo... well sort of... she's just not you know "Angelina kickin ass strong".

Practical Magic

So as if its not bad enough I'm such a sucker for Romance, I also am a sucker for all things Magic! No I'm not like a closet wicken(not that there is anything wrong with that) or anything. But I really get drawn into stories that have to do at all with magic. Harry Potter? Yes Please! Witches of Eastwick? Charmed? The Illusionist? The Prestige? Yes Yes Yes Yes! (some of you are shaking your heads in dismay and saying oh god Jenn why? and to that I say I don't know, maybe because I loved a man who was a magician and its stuck... or maybe its because I like the idea of a world where a spell can fix things).
So of course this movie, Practical Magic, is not just ice cream on a hot day but ice cream banana split with cherry on top on a hot day! And I think it is the ONLY movie I can ever think of where the book actually SUCKED and the movie is something so so much better! How the hell did they ever get this movie out of that book? That book was AWFUL!
But I digress...lets get to it shall we?

Giddy: Magic? Curses? The scene where Sandra makes out with Aiden... YES! We have many giddy moments!

Lie: Sandra's lying to herself about her gifts and Nicole is lying about the accidental murder of her boyfriend.

Big Emotional Outburst: Yes - and it takes a COVEN to resolve it!

Wedding: no

Dance Sequence: Put da lime in da coconut... mmmmm margarita dance (I've had a few of those).

Rewatchable: YES! This is one of those movies my husband really doesn't understand how on earth I could watch so much and has to go find something to do when its on. He knows I will not turn it off mid movie and he can't possibly stomach one more viewing of it.

Love: Yes! A spell cast love, a love that breaks the family curse!

Fantasy: Magic! YEAH!

Journey of the Main Character: I love that classic tale of the girl who denies her own gifts because she's seen as not normal but comes to embrace them and learn that self acceptance is far superior to others'.

Body Count: 2! Husband and boyfriend.

Music Montages/Soundtrack: Oh yes! We have several great montages and this soundtrack has a lot of great classics!

Strong Female: Yes each woman (Sandra an Nicole, Dianne and Stockard) has strength, endurance, and MAGIC! Yay! I assume having magical powers has to make you pretty damn strong. I don't have magical powers... and strength is something I struggle to attain everyday.

The Princess Bride

Blog about the greatest Romantic Comedy of all time? As You Wish!
I would like to mention that the day came when I realized I'm old and that there might actually be people in this world who have not seen this movie. I actually worked with a couple on one of my last jobs and it broke my heart! This is the greatest film of all time. It has everything (well except a lot of females to emulate but we'll get to that later). It should be mandatory in school or something. You know those dumb surveys where they ask if there is only one thing you can bring on an island with you... this is the thing I bring!
However, small sad note, I never realized before that Wesley has a cheezy mustache in this movie. Uck... I usually find almost every man with a moustache to be a child molester (or at least look like one). But I guess I will forgive him.. cause.. well.. he's my childhood fantasy of the perfect man and I'll just have to! Also, its always bugged me, what were the 5 most romantic kisses of all time? I often wanted to have one (I think I did once, in the 42nd street subway station, where time stood still and moved in slow motion around us... but I digress). I have 5 copies of this book (given to me by past loves) and I've read it cover to cover trying to have that answered for me. But it makes a great party game question I guess...so again.. forgiven!
But back to the greatest movie of all time... Oh lets just get right to the check list shall we?

Giddy: From the first cough of the young Fred Savage, I'm in heaven. We have some of the best lines ever written like: "I wonder if he's using the same wind we are using", "Inconceivable", "As you wish", "Move?: Your alive, if you want I can fly", "I don't accept excuses, I'll just have to get myself a new Giant" and many many more!

Lie: The prince is lying to Buttercup the whole darn time! Boo! Boo!

Big Emotional Outburst: A couple small ones...but my favorite is "Hello, My name is Inigo Montoya, You killed my father, prepare to die" (of which I have a great tshirt)

Wedding: Yes! Maaawwwaaaaggeee is wwwwwhhhat bwwwwinnggs us togevah twoday

Dance Sequence: no, but i forgive you!

Rewatchable: I know every line of this movie. And its perfect for every occasion! Its perfect for the Saturday afternoon chore day and its perfect for the date night and its perfect for the getting stoned night (which you may not be able to get through the death of Vizzini without tiring yourself out from laughing so hard)and also perfect for slow days at work.

Love: TRUE LOVE!

Fantasy: True Love (which I have to admit, I went searching for way too long because of this film)! The fantasy of true love alone is pretty darn good, but then you also have storybook fairytale with princes and princess and pirates and sword fights. Mmmm. Lovely!

Journey of the Main Character: Wesley fights everything, even death, to get back to her. Oh also, Fred Savage learns to love books read by his Grandpa.

Body Count: 8 I think: Vizzini, Wesley, The Albino, 4 soldiers and Tyrone :)

Music Montages/Soundtrack: I love this soundtrack. I get weepy every time I hear Storybook Love, I know, I know, its not like it has a bunch of hummable tunes, but it reminds me of this movie, and my heart swells!

Strong Female: Okay, here's the downside... there are only 2 women in this movie. One is a witch ("I'm not a witch I'm your wife") and the other is Buttercup. And for all her beauty, for all her wit and charm, she's just a pretty female that has to be rescued. When I was a little girl, I never cared. Most girls don't. The fairy tales we have grown up listening to were all this way and thus feminism for me was delayed a few years I believe because I didn't grow up necessarily having those great women role models. Well... now I'm stretching it aren't I? Because there were Romantic Comedies like His Girl Friday and anything with Kate Hepburn in it to look up to. But you get my gist right? One of the reasons I am in love with this genre of movie is because, typically, its one of the only genres where women are strong, are role models. And so, even my childhood favorites must be called out, when they do not bring the role models!
But I still love you Princess Bride! I still love you!

Mr. & Mrs. Smith

Okay, technically this isn't a RC. It falls under action/adventure. Proof is in my body count, where I lost count of the dead at 19 and we were only half way through the movie... but... a)lets not forget that it was this movie that broke up the Bennifer and started the Branjolina and it shows cause the chemistry is off the charts in this movie between the two hottest people in Hollywood (who can I just once again gripe about how unfair it is that these two superpowers procreated? What happens to us ugly mortals when the Gods team up? More crap work and groveling that's what!)and b)I laughed a LOT! And as I stated earlier: laughter and love are the key ingredients so with that in mind lets see how this action/adventure Mr. and Mrs. Smith checks off Jenn's list of RC's:

Giddy: Oh yes, but in a "it tingles down there" kind of giddy. This movie is SEXY!! We have 2 dance scenes, the most violent make up sex scene I've ever witnessed and some great funny moments from Mr. Vahn too.

Lie: Mr. and Mrs. Smith have been lying to each other from day 1 pretending to be something they are not while they are both killers.

Big Emotional Outburst: Oh yes in the form of guns and beating the crap out of each other.

Wedding: There is video footage of their wedding... its small but I must count it

Dance Sequence: Yes 2!!!!

Rewatchable: Well yes, yes I think I will

Love: This is that almost competitive kind of love, the kind where they may have to concede at some point that one or the other is slightly better at one aspect of their job but they make an unstoppable team when together.

Fantasy: The fantasy is Brad and Angelina ... either one... together... blowing stuff up... as sexy as they can... mmmmmm

Journey of the Main Character: I think both of them have to learn that the other has some talents they wish they had and learn to fight for their marriage.

Body Count: As I stated previously... I stopped counting at 19! My god, I really don't think horror films ever have as high of body counts as Action movies do... then again- a lot are just getting shot... as we have learned from before being shot does not necessarily mean dead...

Music Montages/Soundtrack: Not that notable to me

Strong Female: I would like to praise Miss Jolie right now...okay she has her flaws and she's a bit weird but no woman has ever held the high honor of Action Hero like her before. She plays strong, sexy, with a hint of vulnerability and I wish so badly I could be her or do her. She plays that perfect strong female here in this movie and I don't even mind (staunch feminist that I am) that she "took his last name" because she breaks every other stereotype of women in two in this film.

Everafter

Sigh...mmmm...I feel like frolicking through a flower laden field and blowing bubbles and dancing barefoot...maybe it's spring is here... or maybe... its EVERAFTER! I love this movie. I love Drew (even though it is obvious she's super self conscious about her accent in this and thus not so good at it - You gotta jump in Drew just like Renee in Bridgette Jones). Again, we have a new take on an old story and no pumpkins or mice needed, we have the classic Cinderella tale turned on its head with a strong woman with Utopian ideals that saves herself and winning the prince is secondary. Here is how the beautiful Everafter adds up to my wish list of RC's:
Giddy: What girl doesn't get giddy from that never worn down phrase: Once upon a time...
Lie: She is pretending to be a rich courtier when really she's just a peasant.
Big Emotional Outburst: Brought on by the evil step mother (a wonderfully over the top Angelica Houston who brings the real honest side of evil: vanity and greed to the role)
Wedding: Yes! But its fraught with the best hysterical crying I've ever seen. Seriously chica - your crying over the wrong guy!
Dance Sequence: not really no...but we have a BALL!
Rewatchable: Yes! This is part of my other Ipod collection! yummy!
Love: I love that this is not a love at first sight, just cause the girl doesn't have dirt under her nails anymore love (like the original story) but that she earns his respect and he is in awe of her fierce spirit and wit and that leads him to see the love.
Fantasy: I don't know a girl who hasn't fantasized about becoming a princess. I still have the occasional fantasy that Prince Harry is going to run into me on the street, fall madly in love, demand I divorce my husband and marry him.... um... yeah it's called a FANTASY!!!
Journey of the Main Character: Her's is not so much as his. He learns to be a better human, a better leader and find love through her. YAY!
Body Count: 1 - the Daddy!
Music Montages/Soundtrack: uh no not really
Strong Female: Yes! Yes!

A Life Less Ordinary

This is one of those films that many will disagree with me on. But I LOVE this movie. Its exactly my kind of humor! A dark dark comedy, great lines like "I thought we agreed - no cliches" and LOTS of great side characters (Holly Hunter is out of control and I love it)! This movie brings Stockholm syndrome to a whole new level! Okay, granted, the end gets a little derailed. It gets a bit weird but so many charming scenes, great chemistry, fantastic side characters and funny romance all throughout the film make me forget that ending. Here is how A life Less Ordinary checks off the Remke ransom demands for RC's:

Giddy: Yes! Ewan always gets me giddy! And he is adorable in this film. The perfect puppy boy!
Lie: There is the whole kidnapping thing...
Big Emotional Outburst: Yes! The love poem scene, the fight to save her from Delroy and Holly, but my favorite is when Ewan is digging his own grave. Classic!
Wedding: Yes! How very Shakespearean we end in a wedding.
Dance Sequence: YES!! I tried so hard to convince my husband to dance our first dance to Beyond the Sea (but he wanted to be "original").
Rewatchable: Yes! I downloaded this to my ipod so I can take it with me on days like today when I'm barely being paid to sit and smile at the very few customers who wander in on a hot day like today.
Love: This is a dark cupid love story - God demands that love happen between these two opposites and angels have a hell of a time making it happen.
Fantasy: Well there's a lot of shooting in this movie that doesn't end in killing them(and anytime you've been stuck in really bad traffic or in an argument with a complete idiot who just keeps making the same illogical point over and over again- you have had the fantasy of wanting to shoot that person - or someone- but not necessarily want the whole death on your hands), then there's the fantasy of being filthy rich, and then there's the comforting fantasy that there are angels out there pushing us toward our destiny.
Journey of the Main Character: The rich girl learns to slum it and open her heart to love and the poor boy learns to be a bit braver
Body Count: 3 (but 2 are not really cause they are angels)
Music Montages/Soundtrack: I like the music in this movie but I don't think there are music montages. I think I heard Squirrel Nut Zippers. I love that band!
Strong Female: Even though she is a spoiled little rich girl she can sure shoot a gun, take control of every situation, have little fear and generally be tougher than anyone else on the screen (except Holly). Oh yes, she's strong!

Did you hear about the Morgans

Oh my god she's back and talking about more RC's? YES! I'm working one of my many jobs that are not helping cover my NYC rent(to quote another not-so-RC-movie "Its hard out here for a pimp) and I had a little free time between kissing the SOHO Chic's asses so I thought I'd rant on this movie I saw last night.
Um.. there are only two ingredients really required in a Romantic Comedy and that is ROMANCE and COMEDY! And this movie... tried... but did not have either really in it. As you know by now, I'm a Hugh Grant fan through and through. No blow job from a hooker is going to turn me away from loving him on the big screen. But every scene it looks like he is desperately trying to get Sarah (or as my husband calls her SKELATOR)to play along and so every line comes out like "hey - maybe you'll find me funny or charming if I say THIS line". Meanwhile, all the surgery and days without food have not only taken away any fat cells left on Sarah Jessica Parker's face but also the ability to react to anything. Ouch, maybe that's a little mean. But ultimately, what we're missing here is JOY. Every great RC has that twinkle in the eye of the actors that lets you know this is fun, this is love, this is JOY! And even Mary Steemburgen seems to have been told this was a drama instead of a comedy. So here is how "Did you hear about the Morgans" (and do I really need to even mention how much that title SUCKS?) adds up to the Remke list of RC Do's:

Giddy: The only time I was Giddy, was when I saw that it was out on video and my husband and I sat down to watch it with a plate full of great pasta. From that moment on though... I was pretty disappointed, sorry to say.
Lie: They are pretending to be from Chicago instead of New York as they stay in the witness protection program.
Big Emotional Outburst: I think there was supposed to be one from Jessica... but I... I... well... I never saw it...
Wedding: Nope
Rewatchable: Nope
Love: Nope - okay that's not fair but really its the kind that is like: I love you but I want to make a baby so much that I drive you crazy and to cheating and then we separate and then we witness a murder together and are forced to be together out in a small town and that makes us bond again...and decide to adopt (the only real positive message I got from this film).
Fantasy: They have a very rich life in NYC that I want...
Journey of the Main Character: I think Sarah is supposed to go through a change out in the small town that makes her love her husband again but um...I ... I ...well... I didn't see it...
Body Count: 1 (thank God for small miracles)
Music Montages/Soundtrack: Oh dear lord, its like the editing team got together and said: Hey this movie is SLLOOWWW paced, lets speed it up with music montages. And they are horrible. Most of the music reminds me of a really bad musical I did in Chicago that I'd rather forget about but it had all that old school country in it. Ug
Strong Female: um... she shoots really well the very first time she picks up a gun?

Dear Producers of Did you hear about the Morgans: I'm sorry - this hurts me more than it hurts you. I know that.